I am sitting here feeling held back, withdrawn. I don't know how to describe it. I express myself through writing. When I put something down on paper, or rather type because who uses paper anymore...I can somehow process it better...no matter what it is.

So, I don't know how to begin. I feel awful. I've never in my life had to process something this difficult...and I've been through a lot of hard things, maybe even more than my share. I would rather live through what I thought was the hardest day in my life up until now a thousand times over than to have to come to grips with what has happened to my family now.

I feel angry, hurt, confused. I feel as if my faith has been shaken. Not my faith in God, or the fundamental things of the church, but my faith in people. How can I ever trust anyone again?

There are unspeakable nightmares every parent has within regards to their children, so horrific and unthinkable that if you did think on these things you would be shaken to your very core. Having to live through this now, I wonder how I'll ever be able to recover.

Part of me, and I'm grateful it is a part at all, knows that I will recover. That through the Savior's love for me, I will heal. But when, and how is unknown to me. So where to begin...

I pray. I pray for my sweet family. I pray that my broken heart will beat properly again. I pray that I can feel my Savior's love. I pray that I can be fixed and though I know I'll never understand why this has happened to my family, I pray that I can be okay with that, that what I will be made to understand will be enough for me.

I don't know how to be. I feel like I have to put on a brave face, but how can I be brave now? I just don't know. I just don't know and I don't understand.

I feel anxious. I'm a very plain facts type of person and in this instant, those plain facts are not good enough, and make me even more confused and hurt.

I finally got some sleep last night. I hadn't slept for almost 40 hours. I know I need sleep, logically I can see that we all need sleep. But now I just feel like I've rested to grieve more, to feel more. I didn't know that I could hurt more...at least when I was zombie-like I was more numb and less feeling, and I have to say that I prefer that. However, because I am a plain facts person, I know that I have to try to be normal and sleep and go through all the motions of a routine so that I can, eventually, be myself again.

I just don't know how to be. So now I have to try to process what I need to do, how I should feel. I have to figure out how to handle this impossible situation. I have to figure out how to forgive, and that has always come so easily for me. It's part of my nature to forgive, to see the better part of someone, I've honestly tried to do that. But in the face of what has happened can I ever truly forgive and give myself that peace, that hope?

And then, it's confusing to me that I don't hate the offenser. And it almost seems like I should and that most people even expect me to. Maybe that's good, maybe that is part of healing...maybe that in itself can tell me that I will be okay. That I will heal.

I have to know that because of my faith in God, because I have knowledge of the atonement and because I know that my Heavenly Father loves me so very much - that He will not forsake me. He will provide me now with what I need to pull through. He will carry me through this. I know these things, but do I feel them? I'm not sure.

So, at a time when I value so very much your opinion and encouragements, on virtually everything life related, I cannot tell you now, or possibly ever, exactly what has happened to make me feel this way. So don't ask, because I can promise no answer.

But I do ask of you to pray for my family. Pray that we can find peace. Pray for us.

I was going to sit down and write about something completely silly, and frankly, uninteresting and unnecessary...especially to the few who actually sit down and read through this rubbish. But I can't. I use this as a journal, quite often and probably more than I should. I, obviously, don't mind that anyone reads it, but I write for me. Sure, sometimes it is to keep people appraised of what is happening in the Garver household, but for the most part I just write what I feel, what makes sense to me at the time, what I want to complain about at the time...whatever.

Oddly enough, however, I feel very overwhelmed right now. I just got through reading parts of a blog recommended by Julie and realized that what I had intended to write about doesn't really matter. In the scheme of things, it isn't exciting, or write worthy. So instead, I'd much rather just tell you that, I love you.

To my good friends, new friends, blogging friends, and family...I sincerely appreciate you and love you. The things that I've learned from you have improved me in ways I cannot even express properly. Words of encouragement when I have been down or sick have come freely from many of you and has been received with a grateful heart.

I know that God loves each of us and our purpose here is to be the very best we can, to endure and return to Him. I often hope that I'm doing it right, that I might be making a difference...

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that you all have made a difference to me. So, thanks. ya.

Captivated By You

Ok, so I love music. Who doesn't? Anyway, I found this song on YouTube and it is so beautiful. One of my "Twilight" friends sent me the link and the video is amateur - at best. Click on it and minimize so you can just hear the music...it really isn't too horrible to watch though, especially if you don't mind looking at Rob Pattinson, which I, admittedly, do not mind. :)

Anyway, the lyrics are below. I think that it's a Christian song and I actually think of the Savior when I listen to it, but that's just me.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nyttAuK6Htk&feature=related

Your laughter, it echos like a joyous thunder
Your whisper, it warms me like a summer breeze
Your anger, is fiercer than the sun in it's splendor
You're close and yet full of mystery
And ever since the day that I saw your face
Try as I may I cannot look away
I cannot look away

Captivated by you
I am captivated by you
May my life be one unbroken gaze
Fixed upon the beauty of your face

Beholding is becoming
So, as you fill my gaze
I become more like you
And my heart is changed

Beholding is becoming
So, as you fill my view
Transform me into the likeness of you
This is what I ask, for all of my days
That I may never look away
Never look away

Captivated by you
Captivated by you
May my life be one unbroken gaze
Fixed upon your beauty
Fixed upon your beauty

No other could ever be as beautiful
No other could ever steal my heart away
No other could ever be as beautiful
No other could ever steal my heart away
I just can't look away

I am captivated by you
Captivated by you
May my life be one unbroken gaze
Fixed upon the beauty
Fixed upon the beauty
Fixed upon the beauty of your face
The beauty of your face.

Christmas tradition, sort of.

Many, many years ago...before children, I found this little story of Three Trees. It warmed my heart and every year I read it at Christmas and during the year as well when I stumble across it in my nightstand. I hope you enjoy it. It is very touching, simple and sweet.



Three Trees

Once upon a mountaintop, three little trees stood and dreamed of what they wanted to become when they grew up. The first little tree looked at the stars and said: "I want to hold treasure. I want to be covered with gold and filled with precious stones. I will be the most beautiful treasure chest in the world!" The second little tree looked out at the small stream trickling by on its way to the ocean. "I want to be traveling mighty waters and carrying powerful kings. I'll be the strongest ship in the world!" The third little tree looked down into the valley below where busy men and women worked in a busy town. "I don't want to leave the mountain top at all. I want to grow so tall that when people look at me, they'll raise their eyes to heaven and think of God. I will be the tallest tree in the world."
Years passed. The rains came, the sun shone and the three little trees grew tall. One day three woodcutters climbed the mountain. The first woodcutter looked at the first tree and said, "This tree is beautiful. It is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining axe, the first tree fell. "Now I shall be made into a beautiful chest, I shall hold wonderful treasure!" the first tree said. The second woodcutter looked at the second tree and said, "This tree is strong, it is perfect for me." With a swoop of his shining axe the second tree fell. "Now I shall sail mighty waters," thought the second tree "I shall be a strong ship for mighty kings!" The third tree felt her heart sink when the last woodcutter looked her way. She stood straight and tall and pointed bravely to heaven. But the woodcutter never even looked up. "Any kind of tree will do for me," he uttered. With a swoop of his shining axe the third tree fell.
The first tree rejoiced when the woodcutter brought her to a carpenter's shop, but the carpenter fashioned her into a feed box for animals. The once beautiful tree was not covered with gold nor with treasure. She was coated in sawdust and filled with hay for hungry farm animals. The second tree smiled when the woodcutter took her to a shipyard, but no mighty sailing ship was made that day. Instead the once strong tree as hammered and sawed into a simple fishing boat. She was too small and too weak to sail to an ocean, or even a river, instead she was taken to a little lake. The third tree was confused when the woodcutter cut her into strong beams and left her in a lumberyard. "What happened?" the once tall tree wondered. "All I ever wanted was to stay on the mountain top and point to God."
Many days and nights passed. The three trees nearly forgot their dreams. But one night golden starlight poured over the first tree as a woman placed her newborn baby in the feed box. "I wish I could make a cradle for him," her husband whispered. The mother squeezed his hand and smiled as the starlight shone on the smooth and sturdy wood. "This manger is beautiful," she said. And suddenly the first tree knew that he was holding the greatest treasure in the world.
One evening, a tired traveler and his friends crowded into the old fishing boat. The traveler fell asleep as the second tree sailed quietly out into the lake. Soon a thundering and thrashing storm arose. The little tree shuddered, she knew she didn't have the strength to carry so many passengers safely through the wind and the rain. The tired man awakened. He stood up, stretched out his hand and said "Peace". The storm stopped as quickly as it had begun. And suddenly the second tree knew that she was carrying the King of heaven and earth.
One Friday morning, the third tree was startled when her beams were yanked from the forgotten woodpile. She flinched as she was carried through an angry jeering crowd. She shuddered when soldiers nailed a man's hands to her. She felt ugly harsh and cruel. But, on Sunday morning, when the sun rose and the earth trembled with joy beneath her, the third tree knew that God's love had changed everything. It had made the third tree strong. And every time people thought of the third tree, they would think of God. That was better than being the tallest tree in the world.

Facebook

Ok, so I have joined up with Facebook, but there's surprisingly a lot to muddle through to figure out how to do anything on it. The basics are simple enough for me, but who has the time to delve into it. Maybe all these sorts of things comes easily to the rest of the world and I'm the only one who struggles. Oh well, it just means that I'm doing other more important things...like keeping in touch with everyone here! :)

We're going to be braving the weather today to get Alex to Speech Therapy...that should be fun and exciting. :) Maybe I'll even try to do some Christmas shopping when Jon gets home tonight...I hear a lot of the stores are open until midnight...I'm at my best at those hours. :)

Albertsons Deal

Ok, so here's what I got tonight:

12 boxes Fiber one pop tarts - .70off/1 x12
8 Packages steamer frozen veggies - 1.00/1 x8
18 pouches of Idaho potatoes (variety) - .35off/1 x18
6 bag Betty Crocker cookie mixes - .50off/1 x 6
7 boxes 40oz Bisquick - .60off/1 x 7
2 boxes Tuna Helper (a filler)
1 Fiber one bar (a filler)

I should have paid $143.80 and I spent $8.98.

I did this by matching each item with exception of my fillers (I left those coupons at home) with a coupon and doubler. I paid twice (zero the first time and then $8.98 the second time)...because Jeremy (the cashier I went to this time), wanted to save himself and myself time by combining orders...I had a total of 10 orders, however.

Not too shabby. :) Oh, and the time it took me to get these deals together this time was crazy because Sam got into my coupons and decorated the carpet with them! It took me two hours just to get them organized again, not to mention then having to sort through them to get the ones I needed for the deals. She's such a helper sometimes. Gotta love it.

Santa picture

Santa here we come. This was too funny. We decided on the spur of the moment to have the kids have their picture taken with Santa. We planned on them visiting Santa anyway, but since there was no line at all we decided to take advantage of that fact. Mind you, it has snowed here and I believe that is the reason for no traffic at Santa's workshop. Regardless, I thought it turned out reasonably well...considering Sam was freaking out over the whole jolly big guy. She was not having anything to do with him and was cringing away every chance she got and we were lucky to get this picture. Not to mention that the boys had hoods on and their hair is sticking up unnaturally all over....oh, and do you notice that Sam has on two different color shoes? People always ask me if I know that she has on two different shoes, and I am always very aware of it, however, I'm just glad she has shoes on at all and since it doesn't hurt anything I figure why not?. At least she had on two of the same type of shoes and not one dress shoe and a tennis shoe, which is usually preferrable to her. I'll be posting pictures later today of the snow and the kids...or maybe tomorrow.

receipt explaination better?

Darn, I don't know if you're going to be able to see this clearly, but this is proof of the cereal deal and maybe it will explain things better than I can. You can't see the 24 boxes of cereal at once on there because the receipt is too big. But you can see how the Acosta deal worked (instant $4.00 savings per $10.o0 spent) and then the $4.00 off 4 boxes of cereal purchased coupon from FM....also, just to think about this, Saturday is the last day this deal will work. It will also work for granola bars, nature valley and fiber one, as well as fruit snacks! :) HOpe that helps.

Grocery deal alert!

Ok, so for anyone who is interested in getting GM products this week, scope out Albertson's! The cereal is a good deal and coupled with the $4.00 off GM products in the FM ad, you'll have a good deal there...even without any manu coupons you'd end up spending $2.00 on 4 boxes of cereal. Not horrible. I plan to get 12 boxes for free, however. I do this because it makes better sense to me. I plan to use 3 FM $4.00 off coupons, 4 $1.00/off 3 boxes GM cereal and one doubler.

Here's how...the cereal is on sale for 2 for $5.00...but for every $10.00 you spend you get $4.00 off instantly...that brings 4 boxes of cereal to $6.00....then if you get 12 boxes, your total is $18.00...then they will take off the 3 FM coupons for $4.00 off which brings your total to $6.00, then you use 4 $1.00 off 3 boxes manu coupons and your total becomes $2.00...then you give them the doubler and your total is ZERO!...make sense?

I'm so horrible at explaining the things in my head...if anyone needs further help, just call me. :)

I can't afford not to post this.

I love Stephanie Meyer. I appreciate her brilliant writing. I found this article that she wrote for the December 2006 issue of the Ensign. I hope you take the time to read this.

http://www.lds.org/gospellibrary/pdfmagazine/0,7779,592-6-1-2006,00.html#

Click on the December issue and then look for the article called, "Hero at the Grocery Store".

What sticks out to me is the line, "I could not afford to have my children learn lessons of compassion only from strangers."

Oh, and you might need a box of tissues.

7 important dates

So, I'm following Julie on this...and posting for my second time today! I guess it beats laying around, which I've done all day because you guessed it...we're sick....again.

"This week’s question asks you to choose up to seven dates (including years or not) that stand out to you for whatever reason. (And please give the reason if you’re willing.)"

December 20th - For several reasons. One, it's my birthday...and even though I've no clue who my father is, I know I was meant to be here and have a purpose. Secondly, I was baptized and confirmed a member of the church on this day, on my 13th birthday! It was incredible and it was my day only, I didn't have to share it with anyone else. My sister gave the most wonderful talk on the Holy Ghost. I remembered seeing a halo above her head during it and thought she was beautiful.

July 19th, 1997 - This was the day when I received my endowments and got married to my sweetheart! We did everything on one day to keep things easier. Before hand I was so nervous and rushing around, and was late for my own endowment/wedding. Jon was pacing in the foyer of the temple. He had rushed so he wouldn't be late and didn't even shave! What's funny about this is that the reason I was so late was because Susan (my escort and one of my favorite people in the world) had only shaved one leg the day before and was staying with me and took forever in the shower shaving the other leg. I think that Dave (Susan's husband and another one of my favorite people in the whole world) was going to kill me because he kept telling me to calm down because I was fidgeting so bad! Everything was so wonderful though. It was a beautiful day.

November 18th - This day, again has a lot of significance to me...Firstly, I started working for my doctors on that day 10 years ago now, and I love my job. Secondly, it was the day I had my first child. What a glorious day! Unfortunately, my labor experience left something to be desired on account of the amount of times I had to be poked, in all sorts of areas on my body, then the hours I spent pushing...only to have a c-section. One of the happiest days of my life.

August 20th - Alex was born. I was so happy. I was really worried that I was going to have to love one of my children less, but my heart just swelled enough for everyone.

March 7th - Samantha was born. She was so lovely. Right after her birth she stopped crying suddenly and the nurse about had an aneurysm...but she just stopped because she was content, and that's exactly how I felt...content. :)

March 22nd - While my sister didn't die on this day, it was the day she was in her accident. My heart broke that day. I had gotten in a fight with her the day before and was staying at a friend's house. I knew something was wrong the next morning, I could feel it. It was unnerving, and my friend kept trying to reassure me, but I wasn't in the mood for reassuring. Then, I got a phone call from a family friend and I remember asking after hearing his voice, "Is she ok?" He didn't tell me anything other than he would pick me up soon and he didn't know. We drove to Eugene and I cried the whole way, I had hoped that she would recover. For four days Terry (her husband) and I sat by her side. I held her hand and sang to her and cried. At one point, she squeezed my hand and I thought she was going to wake up, the emotions that coursed through me then were like nothing I had ever felt. We called the nurse in and they checked her and there was still no brain activity...it was some sort of reflex. My heart wept when Terry, still holding onto hope, asked if we could switch sides so that he could feel her hand respond to his, he kept asking me exactly what I did before I felt her squeeze and he tried all of it to no avail...I sat helplessly watching him realize his beloved sweetheart wasn't going to wake up.

March 30th - My sister's funeral. It was so beautiful. The celebration of her life was amazing. The people she touched in her short 25 years was astounding. There were people there from everywhere! The chapel and overflow and gym were more packed than any zone conference or stake meeting ever! It was standing room only in the back, I believe. Terry worked for Coors at the time, but had also worked at Budwiser and it was comical to see the HUGE trucks in the parking lot (with their various advertisments) and along the road of the church! But she touched so many lives and those men wanted to pay their respect so they stopped in while on their routes. When we traveled to the grave, it was so beautiful. Just a little tiny place nestled deep in the country...if you didn't know where to go you would never find it (I would probably have a hard time finding it now) and its smaller than a football field, by half. Very intimate. Her grave stone was already in place I believe, Terry hand crafted it. He chisled and sand blasted the entire thing on his own, drew the flowers on it and then carefully placed the gold leaf...it is the most beautiful headstone there and the gold against the granite is striking. He layed the brick around the grave and stone just days afterwords and we set concrete on the side for pedestal plants and his hand print is on the right side and mine on the left. She was so special.


So, those are my seven dates...they stick out in my mind when they roll around each year.

way back when

Hey, something kinda funny. I found this song from a friends site. Took me back. I sang this song at a piano recital when I was 15?...I think it was when I was 15. Such a beautiful song. The arrangement I sang was significantly different, but the words are the same and it's really beautiful. My voice coach knew my voice better than I did, so she changed things around so it flowed better.

I Heard Him Come http://www.imeem.com/people/aEKL1B/music/9gcFtEfo/jeff_goodrich_lds_i_heard_him_come/

My friend Shawna and I were quite the team...she played the piano and I sang. We chose church songs, we had a couple of requests after one recital, we thought we were all that! :) Those were the days.

Just another day....

Tomorrow I have another little mini-coupon class. I'm looking forward to it. Today I got all my coupons sorted and now they just need to be cut. I'll get to that tomorrow at some point....it's very daunting when you have over 1,000 coupons to cut and sort and file....oh well, I'll get there. The Food Day has the $10.00 off $50.00 coupons for Safeway and some other good coupons this week. I've not gotten everything sorted yet, but I'm working on it...there are some really good deals out there...I'm still working out the numbers in my head, but I'm pretty sure I've knocked down the Tillamook cheese 2lb brick for about 93 cents. We'll see if I can get it lower than that after I do some more crunching...for that price I might have to get 10 bricks..or rainchecks.

Anyway, I'm much too tired to continue. Days when you just end up falling into bed and actually going to sleep when your head hits the pillow....awe, very rare for me, but I suspect that will be the case tonight! :)

Turkey Chili

We all try to find recipes for leftover turkey that our families will love. So, here's what I did with my turkey this time, or at least part of it anyway:

1 pound or so turkey
1 16oz can tomatoe sauce
1 can of diced tomatoes (these were flavored with garlic, oregano, basil)
1 can of white beans (drained)
1 can of kidney beans (drained)
3/4 cup onion (I sauted this with the turkey)
1 large rounded teaspoon of garlic (again, sauted with the turkey)
1 teaspoon basil
2 1/2 teaspoons of Chili powder
1/4 teaspoon of pepper
1/4 teaspoon of salt (I'm estimating here, it may have been less)

um...I think that's it. Anyway, I just put all of that in a pan after I sauted the onions a bit with the turkey and garlic. I let it come to a boil on medium for a few minutes and that's it. It was sooooo good!

Then we had some corn bread with it. To make that I use one box Jiffy corn mix and 1 box yellow cake mix, I follow the package directions for both and just combine them. You have to use a huge pan for this, but just stick it in the oven at about 350 for about 20-30 minutes depending on your oven.

Good dinner. :) I love turkey.

Good people.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/27930688

The first story in the article was so uplifting...there are such good people out there. When you move onto the second, be prepared with a box of tissue...actually you might need it with the first.

I'm very grateful for my friends and family. We had a wonderful meal today and we are feeling better. We have so much to be thankful for.

I can't help but think about Susan (my foster mother..mother of choice...take your pick) today. What an amazing woman. She's very often in my thoughts and today especially as I think of how very fortunate I am, and how much I have to be thankful for because of her example. I sure do love you and can't wait to see you again.

I feel so very blessed.

Thanksgiving foiled again...

Last year, just before Thanksgiving we all got sick. I think that it's a tradition actually, for me at least, to get sick on Thanksgiving. I know there was a year at some point way back when that I didn't get sick, but it's been so long ago. Not wanting to break that tradition, we are cancelling Thanksgiving again this year.

I'm totally bummed. I know that Vickie, Jon's mom, understands, but man I feel bad. We are truly sick, no more fevers, but we have a nasty cough lingering that just hurts and makes us feel miserable. I know this is something that we cannot control, but come on...it would be nice to get a break.

I'll still make a nice dinner and we'll still do family things, but we just won't have our extended family over, which bums me out. Not to mention that I don't get to try Vickie's Oatmeal cake...and I was so looking forward to that!

Maybe I'll just hunker down and get ready for Christmas and put up our decorations...it's not too early and it would be a fun thing to do.

Climbers...blah

We all have them. Children who fervently believe they are monkies....today that child for me is Sam. She's been climbing on everything! I just don't even understand the thinking behind some choices. Logically, one would think that if you pulled out a drawer, which was already heavy with cds and dvds, and stood in said drawer and hopped up and down that it would be too much for that cabinet to handle. Well, obviously it was not logical to my 2-year-old. I heard a muffled crash and thought better to not ignore it (Sometimes I sigh thinking of all the times I have to rush out of my seat during the day to tend to an emergency...who needs to actually plan time to work out?) and rushed to see what the damage was. Totally irritated that people can't keep their hands on their own things around here, I was probably stomping toward the disaster. I found Sam crying and saying over and over, "I'm sorry, mommy!" How can I honestly be upset with her? What a sweetheart. She knew she had made the mistake, I just wish that it would have been before she knocked over the entertainment dresser/cabinet. Oh well, who needs electronics anyway? We need simpler times. I just hope no actual damage was done and thank goodness that the TV cord didn't get wrapped up in the mess and came flying off the wall...I shudder to think of it.

Ok, crisis contained and alas, things are reasonably back into their regular position. Off to organize my coupons and play with Alex and Sam.

Twilight take 2

Ok, so I promised my friend I would go to Twilight with her today and I saw it a second time. I told myself that I would look at it new and objectively without thinking constantly about what they were doing differently in the book.

The conclusion is that I love it! It was actually a very good movie, I actually enjoyed Rob's performance better this time and it was so much more a pleasant experience.

I'm thrilled that they are going to do a second movie now. I can't wait! :)

So if you were debating on whether or not to see it from my last post, ingore it and watch this...it was very good, and there were scenes that were very sweet, that I didn't necessarily allow myself to appreciate the first time - I'm sure that was partly due to the screaming girls...(this time there were only older women and some men, but we kept ourselves in check a lot better).

So there.

Twilight 2 cents worth....

Look at me..getting all fancy and putting a picture in my post and everything. That man is just yummy.

Ok, so I saw the movie. I don't know where to begin. First of all, did I like it....sort of. Will I buy the movie when it comes on DVD? Probably.

I thought that Kristen Stewart did a great job protraying Bella. Keep in mind that I LOVE Rob Pattinson...but I didn't necessarily enjoy his interpretation of Edward. Of course, Edward is like, the most classy, wonderful, beautiful vampire man in the known world....and I imagine it would be very hard, if not impossible, for any actor to fill those shoes. Having said that, do I think that he could have still done a better job...absolutely. Is this going to take away from Rob Pattinson as an actor in my eyes? No, not really...I still really like him. There was still something left to be desired, in my opinion (and we all know how desirable Edward is)....sigh.

So, what it comes down to is that I hope that a ton of people go to see this movie and that they make a ton of cash so that the next movies will be absolutely above and beyond what this should have been. There were funny parts, overacted parts that were totally laughable (not in a good way laughable)...like when Edward "smells" Bella for the first time, when I read the book I pictured Edward grimacing, but having a lot more composure than Rob protrayed him in the film, he honestly looked like he was going to barf, but the Edward I think of would never show weakness in that way.

I don't know...it was good...but bad at the same time. I just don't know what to think. Things were sort of thrown out of place a lot. The kiss scene was really good, but again, the book did it so differently and I think that they could have just followed that part a bit better.

It was good, it was just not what I expected. I understand that they have to cut a lot out, but come on....Hollywood should know with this fan base that we'd be willing to sit through an 8 hour movie....well, 6 hours at least. So really they don't need to cut so much out next time. LOL

Blah...I just don't know what to think on this one. I'm at a loss for any more words.

Life list

So, Jon got me something while he was away, and I feel thoughtless that I didn't do the same for him. Anyway, he got me something that was just very me...Hard Rock Hotel PS3 drum sticks. LOL I know it may seem silly to most of you, but I love them! They have flames that go up the sticks. Very nice. I'm looking forward to putting them to the test...maybe they'll help me play better? I seriously doubt it, especially since you have to actually play frequently to get better, but I look forward to giving them a shot anyway.

I never have learned to play an instrument, but this is fun.

So, here's the scoop. I was talking to a friend of mine, Theresa (she helped me with the class, and I'm sure it wouldn't have turned out for the better without her help) and she said that they were doing life lists at their house. I asked her what that meant and she said that everyone was writing down things that they wanted to accomplish in their lifetime, not by a certain date or time (in fact, she said that they purposely didn't put a time limit on these things). I thought this a very interesting thing and remembered that when I was about 14 or 15 I did the same thing, of course, I cannot find that list anywhere, maybe it's in an old journal or something buried or forever lost. I remember on that list I had wanted to be an orthodontist by the time I was 25 (how naive I was then to think I would finish school in that short of a time and a residency) and that I wanted to have read The Book of Mormon, things like that.

Obviously, I'm not an orthodontist. I do work in the dental field, but by no means am close to that goal, or have any desire for that at this point in my life now. I have read The Book of Mormon front to back since that time, but I can only count once that that has happened. I usually skip around and read all over the place depending on my mood, which is pretty sad considering I'm going to be 30 next month...

So, I was thinking about doing a new list. I would like to challenge you to do the same actually because I think that it would be fun. Here's a few things that I can come up with that I don't mind sharing:

Read The Book of Mormon front to back. (I can't put a number on the amount of times to read it, so I'll just leave it at that...I don't know that such a number really could exist anyway.)

Have another baby (Jon would tell you he would rather I forgot about this one, but I just can't. And, since I wanted to be done by the time I was 30, and that is obviously not going to happen, who knows!)

This is really lame and silly, I know, but I can't help putting it on the list because I'm that vain....but get a tummy tuck! LOL (Hey, I don't think that my body was supposed to react as badly as it did when having kids...even my doctor said it was really uncommon.)

I'll probably regret putting this on the list someday, but run a marathon. (This also implies loosing about 50lbs or so....)



Ok, that's enough for now. I've got to get some more things done that don't have to be on any list, they just have to get done...

Whew!

So, it's over. I did it. Although, my voice is nearly gone now. The coupon class was a success. I think people learned something they didn't know before they came. I don't know how much that was, things took a direction I didn't necessarily mean it to, just meaning that I kept letting myself get off track and jumbled around quite a bit trying to touch bases on so many different aspects of couponing. I'm a very one track mind gal and when I get off subject it is hard for me to remember where to jump back on the train to make sense. I'm going to try something a little different. I'm going to get myself organized in the next few weeks, hopefully sooner, so that I can help people copy cat. I'll tell you where I'm going to get my deals, what coupons I use to get my deals so whoever wants to do the same can.

I don't know how successful I'll be at this, mostly because I keep so many things in my head all the time. It's crazy. I can't explain it any other way than I see a number for an item and automatically my mind breaks it down. Instantly I remember what coupon could go with it, where I have it placed and whether or not I can use a doubler with it and whether or not another store has a similar deal...then I break that number down until I can get that item for the least cost to me. But I don't know why my brain works like this, it just does it automatically such that I'm going to have to try very hard to write down the process it takes me to come up with the "deal"....and even now I'm not sure that I'm making sense so that you even know what I'm talking about! ACK! So, I guess instead of saying I got this for this price, I'm going to try to tell you how I came up with that price at all. I've got some figuring to do.

Jon comes home tonight! Yippie! I can't wait to see him. I've missed him. The kids have missed him, too.

Now, I think I'm going to watch part three of Pride and Prejudice...I've never seen it before and am actually enjoying it. I'm thinking of getting Jane Austen's complete works...we'll see.

Oh, and for the record, my foot is killing me! This last August I was racing Austin on a scooter and I fell up the driveway...I know nice, right...who falls UP? Well, I wasn't too smart and wore flip flops while doing this and when I fell I slammed my foot into the driveway and took the skin off all my toes and the top of my foot. I hit the top of my foot so hard and my foot was swollen and black and blue and looked horrible for weeks. I toughed it out and never got it looked at. Since that time, the top of my foot has hurt so badly, at times it has become unbearable and I've taken some old Vicodin left over from an ear infection some time ago. I don't know they can do anything about it since it's been months, but something is seriously wrong with it and I think that I'm going to have to go in now to have it looked at. Since I was standing on my feet for the class tonight it's worse and I took my shoe off and it's swollen..that's not a good sign. I think I have a few Vicodin left which might work even if they are a few years old. I really don't like to take pain meds, but man how...this stinks.

Enough babble for now. I really am a good babbler...hehe.

Last night I read the scripture and prayer myself (naturally since I'm the only one who can read fluently) and our little discussion was quite interesting. It always both validates and surprises me how much my children know about the scriptures. I try, don't always succeed, at quizzing the boys about the scriptures after they are read to see if they have any understanding...last night I informed them before I read that I was going to quiz them so they could prepare and really think about what I was going to read. Here's how the discussion went:

I read: D&C 58: 42-43: "Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more. By this ye may know if a man repenteth of his sins - behold, he will confess them and forsake them."

I asked Alex first what he thought that meant and what Heavenly Father wanted us to learn from this scripture, he said, "Um, it means that we need to be great to everyone and be baptised."

Not sure he actually heard the scripture, but getting a really good response nonetheless, I moved on to Austin. He replied, "It means that when we say a naughty word we need to tell Heavenly Father we are really sorry. I always tell him I'm sorry when I say a naughty word. Then He says, 'ok'."

So, wow. I was rather pleased he got something out of that, maybe it's just great teaching on Sister Dube's part, or mine or Jon's, but he got it somewhat. (By the way, the naughty word to which he is referring is "oh my gosh".)

Anyway, I proceeded to tell them that those answers were really great, but that I wanted them to be sure to know that after they said that they were sorry they needed to not do that again and that was what it meant in the scripture to "forsake".

There you have it. It was a very good discussion.

Feeling anxious.

Jon's going to be leaving this week for only a few days, but it's been years since he had to go to a seminar or anything. The last time he left to go play with a friend in Vermont, I went to pieces. I literally cried, uncontrollably for the entire time he was gone. Granted at that time I was pregnant with morning sickness(I can't remember if I was on bedrest at that point in the pregnancy or not as well), and the flu and taking care of a very sick toddler...but still, it was a rough time. I don't see that happening this time by any means, but it makes me nervous to know he's going to be gone.

I rely on him a lot. He's such a good man, the best man for me. :)

Then, I finally have to teach the coupon class this week on Friday. That makes me nervous on account that I haven't taught a huge group before, so we'll see how that goes. I'll post when it's finished to let everyone know how it turned out. With luck it will go how I have planned and everyone will understand what I'm talking about....

We're feeling better today, all of us. I think we had food poisoning from pizza from Austin's birthday. All of us were sick yesterday (I actually fell asleep three times due to exhaustion). Poor Sam was having a hard time making it to the toilet, and she's really good about that. She's not had any troubles today now, so I think the worst is behind us. Thankfully.

Ok, I've got to get going to start dinner. I've got to get a bunch of dictation done still before the end of the night.

For FHE tonight we'll be watching a Tom and Jerry cartoon that Austin got for his birthday, which is officially tomorrow actually. ;)

Agh!

So I think that I may be starting to get Austin's cold/flu thing. I don't feel well. I haven't curled up on the couch for a while with the boys to watch a cartoon or video while Sam took a nap for a long time. Today I did and fell completely asleep. We were watching some sort of Playhouse Disney cartoon, and I don't even remember what it was. Anyway, I woke up to Sam's muffled cries. She was sitting on the floor next to the couch right by my head pouting. Apparently there was no room for her to squish in and cuddle too. It cracked me up. I picked her up and placed her on my lap after some adjustments and Austin very kindly moved over so she could fit. It's amazing how just a simple gesture can improve someones outlook so drastically. She was so very content in sitting with me and stopped crying immediately. What a sweetheart my children are. I love how they are very aware of each other and each other's feelings...sometimes.

Funny!

Ok, so I was reading the news online and something caught my eye about Twilight....I clicked on it and this is what I found...the lost script. I laughed so hard...

http://movies.msn.com/movies/galleryfeature/lost-twilight-script/?photoidx=1

You have to go through all the photos and click off to the side for the dialog....cracks me up.

Leave Out All The Rest

Ok, all you Twilight fans..there's a song on the soundtrack that is really good and it's been stuck in my head. (Ya, I know I'm pathetic...I got the soundtrack.)

Here's the words:

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
'Cause no one else cared

After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
when I'm done here?

So if your asking me
I want you to know

When my times comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I'm shed but I'm me

I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you

So if your asking me
I want you to know

When my times comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come
and save me from myself
I can't be who you are

When my times comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending someone else can come
and save me from myself
I can't be who you are, I can't be who you are


There is a lot of really good music on this cd, a wide range of artists, including a couple of songs from Rob Pattinson (the guy who plays Edward in the movie coming out)...his song style and music is very interesting, but I actually really like it...very Jeff Buckley, who I really like, too.

So that's it I guess...it's just stuck in my head and I thought I'd share.

Other than that, nothing exciting to report. Austin has a really high fever and started getting sick last night before dinner. I just gave him some Motrin on account that his temp was 103.7...which for him isn't too terrible, but still rather high. I thought I'd try to get it to come down a little bit at least. I don't usually worry so much with him until it gets past 104.3....which at the rate he's going could happen tonight. Oh joy. At least I get to go to a meeting tonight so I can escape it for a few hours right?

Sunday's lesson in Relief Society

I was so moved during the lesson in Relief Society this past Sunday, I was going to blog about it yesterday, but my heart was too full and I knew things would come out in a mush or I would fall to pieces...again. There's no hope that I will keep a dry eye now. I'm sure some of the ladies in the ward thought I was a boob because I just couldn't keep the tearing from spilling over.

Sister Boswell is such an inspired leader. She allowed the spirit to direct her during her lesson and I have no doubt that is why the spirit spoke so strongly to me. She gave great insite to the times of these letters as well. Anyway, here's some of the letters:

To Emma Smith on October 13, 1832, from New York City, New York: “This day I have been walking through the most splendid part of the city of New York. The buildings are truly great and wonderful, to the astonishing of every beholder. … After beholding all that I had any desire to behold, I returned to my room to meditate and calm my mind; and behold, the thoughts of home, of Emma and Julia, rush upon my mind like a flood and I could wish for a moment to be with them. My breast is filled with all the feelings and tenderness of a parent and a husband, and could I be with you I would tell you many things. …
“I feel as if I wanted to say something to you to comfort you in your peculiar trial and present affliction [Emma was pregnant at the time]. I hope God will give you strength that you may not faint. I pray God to soften the hearts of those around you to be kind to you and take the burden off your shoulders as much as possible and not afflict you. I feel for you, for I know your state and that others do not, but you must comfort yourself knowing that God is your friend in heaven and that you have one true and living friend on earth, your husband.”3
To Emma Smith on November 12, 1838, from Richmond, Missouri, where he was being held prisoner: “I received your letter, which I read over and over again; it was a sweet morsel to me. O God, grant that I may have the privilege of seeing once more my lovely family in the enjoyment of the sweets of liberty and social life. To press them to my bosom and kiss their lovely cheeks would fill my heart with unspeakable gratitude. Tell the children that I am alive and trust I shall come and see them before long. Comfort their hearts all you can, and try to be comforted yourself all you can. …
“P.S. Write as often as you can, and if possible come and see me, and bring the children if possible. Act according to your own feelings and best judgment, and endeavor to be comforted, if possible, and I trust that all will turn out for the best.”

Wow. Be still my heart Joseph! What an amazing comfort Emma must have felt when she read those words, "I feel for you, for I know your state and that others do not, but you must comfort yourself knowing that God is your friend in heaven and that you have one true and living friend on earth, your husband."

To Emma Smith on November 12, 1838, from Richmond, Missouri, where he was being held prisoner: “Tell little Joseph he must be a good boy; Father loves him with a perfect love. He is the eldest and must not hurt those that are smaller than him, but comfort them. Tell little Frederick Father loves him with all his heart; he is a lovely boy. Julia is a lovely little girl. I love her also. She is a promising child. Tell her Father wants her to remember him and be a good girl. Tell all the rest that I think of them and pray for them all. … Little Alexander is on my mind continually. O my affectionate Emma, I want you to remember that I am a true and faithful friend to you and the children forever. My heart is entwined around yours forever and ever. Oh, may God bless you all, amen. I am your husband and am in bands and tribulation.”

When Joseph speaks to his children and calls them by name and gives direction to them it reminds me of the how Alma and Helaman where with their children, and the strippling warriors. What a blessing for them to know, not only is their father acutely aware of them and their wants and needs, but also that the prophet is praying for them.

Good grief. There is just so much I want to discuss. There is so much we have to learn from that man. I can only hope that just these few letters leave you with a desire to read this lesson. It's very touching.

Ok, I've got a clean up to tend to, I would love to write more, but we all know how that goes.

Good deed done.

So, I had something happen to me today that I've never had happen. I was getting one of the new salted carmel hot chocolates from Starbucks...a guilty pleasure. I was in the drive thru because it was pooring rain and I didn't want to get soaked...it was bad enough I had to roll down my window. Anyway, I went to pay and the gal told me that the guy in front of me had already paid for my drink! Can you believe that?! What was even more funny was that I was complaining to myself after ordering about how I was going to spend $4.00 on this drink when I get an entire grocery cart full of food for about that same price. I was telling myself that it's ok to indulge every once in awhile and trying to talk myself out of feeling bad and then that happens! How funny is that?! So, I had to pay for the person's order behind me, but I got a deal still because that was only $2.15! Kind of made my day....doesn't take much, but it was really cool.

Today was a good day. I ended up getting all the laundry folded and actually put away! That, in itself, was a huge accomplishment and I think you'd agree if you saw how huge the pile was! Then we got the entire downstairs picked up, with exception of my office...but I'm not sure that will ever be organized and I've kind of resolved myself to the fact that it just is going to be rather lived in messily for awhile. I've got other things to worry about that are more of a priority..like people.

Austin has been riding the bus. He actually likes it a lot. I've been enjoying walking the couple of blocks to the stop to pick him up. It's been kind of funny how much Alex talks during that time. He's such a sweet spirit. He was telling me today about how he found a coupon in the bushes yesterday and couldn't believe I didn't pick it up. I told him that I didn't even see any coupon on the ground because surely I would have picked it up. "That's what I thought, mom, I knew you didn't saw it." When we went by the same bush it was still there today and I saw that it was only an ad, not a coupon. I regret now that I didn't pick it up, not because Alex thought it was a coupon, but because it was a good opportunity for him to see that even if I didn't want that particular thing it would be good to pick up the trash and take care of it. I didn't think about it until we were home. Maybe I'll bring a bag so we can pick up trash along our route to and from the bus stop so he has the opportunity to help in his community. (Maybe if he is so willing to pick up outdoors the desire to do that indoors will be greater?...I know...wishful thinking.)

Anyway, I've got to get some work done before it gets too much later. Hope this finds you all well.

Benign!

So, one of the lumps is a benign cyst and the other is a "fatty nodule". I'm quite relieved. Whew! :)

Blah!

I'm completely nervous and anxious, I can't even say. I found a lump in my breast a couple of months ago and immediately made an appointment to see my doctor...they couldn't get me in to see them until this last Monday. So, I thought, I won't worry because there's no point in doing so until I know what to be worried about. A month after that I found another lump, in my other breast. Still, I remained calm and placed my fears on the Lord. How incrediblely peaceful I was about this. I hardly gave it any more thought actually.

Then I saw the doctor on Monday and was relieved because then I would know what was going on. But then, when the doctor told me that he wasn't sure what to make of one of the lumps, I felt sick. Why was I panicking now? I have had months to think about this, why am I so nervous now...it's driving me crazy. He told me that he wanted me to wait another 3-4 weeks, 4 weeks max, and then if it was still there then I needed to call and they would get me in for imaging immediately. One thing he kept saying was that I was so young...and so that was good. But hey, let's face it...I'm going to be 30 in about a month...which is still young, but older.

So, after hearing that I started thinking that maybe I should just get the imaging done now. I met my deductible when I was hospitalized in June for ectopic pregnancy....why wait? I called the doctor and he agrees now is a good time as any to start that process and I'm going in to start the process in a couple of hours. I don't even need to wait long....but it's long enough.

Maybe that's why I've thought so much about all sorts of weird things in the last few days...Blah...I have to get ready to go.

On the way to healing, I think.

I've been thinking lately a lot about my mom. As you all know, her illness has brought me a lot of heart ache throughout my life. I resolved myself some time back that I would not allow her to be part of my life...only on very limited terms. I did this to protect my own sanity and my family. I try not to talk to her too often, and I don't even allow her to have my home phone number or address.

I chose this more extreme course of action after the last police visit a couple of years ago...or almost a couple of years ago, on that Sunday morning. It makes me sick to think about it. It is still mind boggling to me that she would accuse me of child abuse, drug use and child starvation....all because I can only imagine the voices in her head told her this. I'll never forget how one of the officers held his hand on his gun the whole time and ordered my husband to sit down in his own home. It just makes me angry. And the fact that they left no cupboard unopened and that they went through my personal things, I felt very violated. I felt relief afterwords, however, when they realized that this was a mistake and that an appology was in order, that we provided a good home and seemed like a very loving family.

Having said all of that, recently I've been re-thinking my stance on allowing her more contact with us. There were so many other things, other hurts that I just can't seem to get over or deal with very well, but I'm trying. I know that she's a wonderful, very giving person...now. She's better, but I still can't help thinking that at what point is it going to get bad again?

This is something that I'm really struggling with, I just don't know what to do. I discussed it briefly with Jon the other night that I was thinking I might invite her to come to Thanksgiving. He said that he wasn't sure it was a good idea. I know he knows I struggle with this and he is such a support to me, especially when dealing with her and all the absolutely crazy, outlandish things that she's come up with over the years. So, I feel bad about wanting to let her back in, albeit only for a day or two, because I don't want Jon to hurt if I hurt...does that make sense? And furthermore, I know that if I do let her come she's going to press to come more...which I'm not sure I can handle.

So, what do you think? What should I do? Do I allow more time for healing and just keep going on and doing what I've been doing...only allowing phone calls? Do I allow her to come back into my life, my children's lives, on a trial basis to give things a go again? It's all overwhelming. My heart hurts and I just don't know what to do. I rely on my Father in Heaven so much in this case, but I'm torn between several reasonable options and I just don't know which one is what He wants me to do. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. ACK!

too funny

This was just too funny to pass up...check it out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f86qKQJg3Z8

Blue Angels!

Austin's very first basketball game is tomorrow at 3:30pm at Hoops in Beaverton. I'm really excited. He's been practicing a lot and he is actually one of the best on the team. Go Angels!

It was a good night for trick or treating! We only went to about 15 houses. We planned on doing trunk or treat up at the church, but didn't make it there in time. I was worried if we showed up late that we would have a hard time getting a spot and I didn't want to worry about running over little ones. We had a good time going over to Grandma and Papa's house and visiting with them.

I feel like this is just jumble, but sometimes that's just the way it is....Jon's sister Stacey finally completed and has published her first book, "Hallowed Moon". You can find it pretty much anywhere, but it's by S.M. Nelson....I must confess I don't know anything about it really, just that it is about werewolves. Check it out. :)

I got to talk with Susan, one of my mom's, and she seems to be doing really well. She's such an amazing woman...I can't even begin to tell you. It makes me so happy to talk with her, or rather have her listen to me because I'm so long winded.

I've got some great stuff to post, but it will have to wait until tomorrow. I'm entirely too tired to do anything else tonight.

I'm so blessed.

Sloppy savings

Ok, so I must admit I've not been good at getting my deals for the last month. It has seriously been an entire month since I've been grocery shopping. I went tonight and did a deal since the $10.00 off $50.00 came out from Safeway and did ok, although I'm not really that proud...I could have done better if I had gone to Safeway, but I was lazy and took it to Albertsons. Regardless, here's what I got:

1 48 oz. Apple Juice
1 48oz. Grapefruit juice
2lbs bananas
2 bags Salad
2 pkgs baby carrots
1 lb roma tomatoes
1 avacado
1 frozen pumpkin pie
2 pie crusts
2lb tillamook cheese
2lb shredded mexican cheese
1 tub sour cream (see a theme here?)
1 box sandwich bags
1 fancysmancy Vanilla extract(large bottle)
12 count eggs
24 20oz. Sobe Elixir drinks
2 bags doritos
2 boxes capri suns
(I'm going off memory here, and I may be missing something still)

I spent $39.38. I told you I'm slacking...big time. I used only store coupons and I did have 24 .50c/1 Sobe coupons that I doubled so I could get all my sobe drinks for free. I only mangaged to save about 67% off my total, which puts me once again in my slacking category. Grrr....

However, including tonights total, this month I've only spent $51.38 on groceries...hey, I had to buy milk and eggs and bread right? So I guess, in the end it was manageable. I plan to go out tomorrow night again to get some candy for trick or treaters, but I've got coupons for all of that and I plan to only spend about $10.00...so I'll have to add that to my budget for the month.

Oh well, we always have next month. I'm a little bummed though because there were just so many deals I could have gotten, I just didn't want to do it. I got burned out. Then I was reading the Twilite books, which took up my time too. Don't know if anyone is interested or not, but on Stephanie Meyer's website she has listed some "Outtakes" that were taken out during the editing phases of her first two books. I did read them and they are pretty good, I think there is one that I didn't particularly like, so I'm glad it didn't make it into the book after all...

Anyway, I'm going to get some dictation done. I've got a lot to do on account of my being gone most of the day because of car troubles....grrrr. Alas, it is all taken care of though.

Tonight we were reading scriptures and it was Jon's turn. He read D&C Section 58, the verses that stand out are scripture mastery, but were so amazingly powerful..they were 26-29:

"For behold, it is not meet that I should command in all things; for he that is compelled in all things, the same is a slothful and not a wise servant; wherefore he receiveth no reward. Verily I say, men should be anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of their own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness; For the power is in them, wherein they are agents unto themselves. And inasmuch as men do good they shall in nowise loose their reward. But he that doeth not anything until he is commanded, and receiveth a commandment with doubtful heart, and keepeth it with slothfulness, the same is damned."

Made me think...I'm really slothful and should be doing more, not because it is a commandment necessarily (although I think that even just thinking that will put me on the right track) but because I have a desire to do more and be better. I have heard so many times that you can serve without love but you cannot geniunely love without service. How true is that?

I'm going to set some new goals for myself this week, and start small. I think in doing this I just might endure better and have a better reward....

For now, however, I'm really tired and need some sleep, I'm not entirely sure I've made any sense at all, but I know what I'm trying to say.

I've got to get so much done today, but now that I don't have to worry about water everywhere it's ok. Things will work out. The things I've got to get done are not within reach. It's going to be a great day.

One of the things I've got to get back into is my couponing. I've not been shopping in 2 weeks! Oh my goodness. I've meant to go, but have had no desire, partly due to the fact that I was reading all the time, and partly because I just got tired. I finally had to break down and get milk yesterday and eggs, but I still with one coupon spent $11.00 on 5 gallons of milk and 1 carton of eggs. Not too shabby, I'm sure I could have done better in overages, but I was lazy. I've got some coupons for you as well Julie, I'll try to get them over to you sooner than later.

I am blessed.

Ok, so another tech came out to figure out the dishwasher and did! Apparently the top of the dishwasher when assembled didn't get tightened down. The guy had to turn it more than 4 full turns to tighten it all the way. I've ran two cycles and no water has leaked. Yippie! All in a days work. I think that it is the customer service people that just make things so much worse. I've been on the phone talking to them several times over the last day and a half and they just gave me the run around so many times that it just frustrated me beyond belief. Then, when you are talking to people who just don't move quickly enough when you have water everywhere, it tended to make me a little on edge. (The last lady told me that she couldn't get a tech out here until Friday afternoon, to which I replied, "I'm sorry, but that isn't reasonable, please call me back when you have a better answer for me later today." *Click*) Not to mention that Sam woke up with a fever and runny nose...again, which makes her very CranKy. Oh well, all is well now.

I'd better get some more dictation done before I get even further behind. :)

I don't know if I could be more frustrated today or not. I hate it when I get so consumed with things that I can't even think straight. My dishwasher was installed yesterday and it looks nice. However, when I ran a load yesterday, it's obviously not working properly or wasn't connected right because the kitchen flooded. I don't know what this means, but it really frustrates me. A tech came out today to inspect and since I had cleaned all the water up last night and things were dry, he couldn't tell where any leak could have occurred. So, he said I should try running the dishwasher again and see where the leak is coming from. I've no clue.

I ran it again, and once again water started coming out from underneath the cabinet and under the stove, no water is coming from the dishwasher area. avl;ijadl;fjal;ksdfjl;akfgl;akfglpjh!!!!

So, I've got to figure out what is going on here. I know that I'm the tallest when I'm on my knees, but when I kneel I get water all over myself. (That's my sorry attempt at humor right now.)

Alas, back to cleaning up more water. Grrrrrr.

Beautiful video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mMfr9Ewp8o4&NR=1

Twilight Saga finally ends at my house!

Wholy Buckets! I was so engrossed...ya that is a good word, in the books that I didn't stop to put them down for nearly 1 week. I read until late in the evening/morning, sat outside while the kids played, neglected all housework...and now I'm finished. Kind of bitter sweet actually. I really loved the books. All of them were such smart reads. I'm hooked now, so much so that I've started reading the fifth book that was never fully completed on Stephanie Meyer's official website. It's Edward's perspective...we'll see what that is like. I've only read the first chapter, but it's pretty engrossing...like anyone who has read the series could say.....here we go again...maybe I won't end up posting for another couple days now...drats.

I just got my dictation for the night from Dr. Milne and he was incredibly long winded, which hasn't been too uncommon lately. Anyway, I was going to have a mini-coupon class with Tonya tomorrow, but as it turns out I'm going to be typing...still. So, I spoke with her and she was thinking maybe Thursday would work best for us. I think that should be fine, but I feel badly to have to reschedule.

I still have to head over to Target tonight or maybe tomorrow at some point to get some more shelves. I can't stand that I have so much food storage that doesn't have a place...it's annoying and Sam gets into things a lot more because of it.

Ok, the doc finally stopped rambling so I can start my work now.

We finally heard from the home warranty people and we are getting our new dishwasher delivered next Monday. We'll likely have it installed next week some time, I'm hoping later in the day Monday or Tuesday. It cost us $55.00 for the deductible, which we already paid, and then $57.00 for the upgrade to stainless steel. I wish we could have gotten a nice payout, but I'm just happy we are getting a new dishwasher. It's depressing knowing that my dishes are piling up and having to do them by hand is both time consuming and annoying. In our last house I had to do dishes by hand for too long that I just don't want to relive it for even a week. Am I pathetic or what?

Something I thought was kind of interesting is that we can put an "add-on" onto our policy through Sears and get the warranty company pricing on our other appliances as well. Interesting...might be nice to see what it would cost us if we got a different stove, although the stove does work fine and I even have another stove in the garage...maybe I'll just not worry about that. Nice thought though...I guess if anyone needed a new appliance right now I could see what that cost would be through this for you and order it through me with the discount. Just a thought.

So much for getting all my dictation done this morning, work out in and a shower before noon. I spent entirely too much time on the phone trying to figure out the dishwasher thing.

It looks like on November 21st I'll be teaching a couponing class for the ward. I've never done a class in a great big group before so I'm hoping that things go well, kinda makes me nervous.

Ok, gotta get to work now.

So, I was busy, not getting very many things done and I ran across a blog that touched my heart. I posted it on the side and when you have a chance, you should read it...now on my days that I feel overwhelmed and heavy burdened, I can know that it's going to be ok, that my burden is less than others and I should be grateful for the things I have that are so very dear to me.

http://jsfight.blogspot.com/

I'm thankful for steam cleaners

Today started off ok, and I guess is rounding the bend ok, too. It was a little nuts in the middle. This morning I helped Julie figure out some more things with coupons and that was fun. I then got a lot of other things done and accomplished today, but the day just got away from me. I didn't get a shower until early evening, which isn't necessarily uncommon. I did get about 10 loads of laundry folded and put away, the kids helped me pick up the living room and the hallway and partially cleaned their room. We got all the dirty laundry sorted and more loads started. All in all we got a lot done.

Finally after we got the chores done I decided to put a program on for the kids and take a shower. The night before I had to take one when Jon got home because the kids were too busy to be left alone. If it hadn't been for the fact that I had two visiting teaching appointments tonight I would have done the same thing tonight, but since I had plans I needed to shower. I put pork chops in the oven to start cooking so that when I put them on the grill I would know they were cooked all the way through. Then I got in the shower. My shower was nice and hot. Shortly after I got out, Austin came up the stairs and said that Sam and Alex had gotten some soap on the carpet. I get dressed and head downstairs......some soap doesn't begin to describe it.

Alex and Samantha were completely drenched in soap and water. They took the hand pump soap, used to wash after using the potty, from the downstairs bathroom and unloaded it onto the family room floor. Well, one of them, or perhaps both collaborated got a great idea to haul water into the living room and poor that on the floor to make it clean with bubbles. An entire 6x8' area was completely covered in water(we're talking gallons), soap and bubbles! If it hadn't been for the fact that I needed to be somewhere I would have gotten the camera to show the world my inventive children.

I stripped both children and put them in the bath, went downstairs (fortunately I still had Teresa's steam cleaner that I borrowed last week) and proceeded to clean the nice freshly cleaned carpet. I'm glad now that it was a clean floor at least so I didn't have to wipe down things as well as clean the carpet. I went back upstairs to check on the naughty children and found that they had unloaded two bottles of shampoo, one of which is REALLY smelly men's shampoo. Sam was covered head to toe in the stuff. I didn't have time to wash them with regular soap so I rinsed them off and sent them to find clothes for themselves. Meanwhile I take out the chops and start the pasta, and at this point I don't even have time to grill it as well because I'm already running late for my first appointment.

Jon came home and I had to leave instantly with him to finish supper and take care of the rotten ones, who I'm sure no doubt would be great for him.

Visiting teaching was nice and refreshing, I have a great companion and quite lovely sisters to teach, actually who I have no doubts will teach me a thing or two. :)

Just another day in the Garver household. It's just a really good thing that I have a lot of everything all the time (to replace all the things that get spilled, broken, misplaced, abused, etc.) or maybe that is the problem....

Thanks

Since I posted that I needed help with Alex, he's been A LOT better. In fact, he hasn't said "hate" once since then. He's screamed a couple of times, but only at frustration with zipping up his coat or something like that. I think it has been prayer, to be honest, that has brought about this mighty change and one other thing. I've charged him with being a helper. I have been asking him to help me do little things - take out the trash, pick up his toys, etc...and then I praise him for it. He seems to think that is quite nifty. It is almost night and day now the difference. I'm still looking forward to my book getting here, and I know that a couple of days of good behavior doesn't necessarily mean a lifetime of it, but I'm hopeful. So, thanks for keeping us in your thoughts, I think doing so has helped.

Another thing I think helped was that we went over to Grandma and Papa's house the other night for a little bit and they enjoyed themselves (the kids that is, I can't speak for the grandparents). They had fun playing with some new toys and getting what they thought was special attention. They don't see them that often because we are all busy, so it was really nice. Thanks Grandma for helping out and letting us hang out. :)

Nothing new to post...I'm going to try something new with my deals. I'll start posting what coupons to use with doublers and what store to go to and how much money you should spend to see if that helps you guys out so you can copy cat. Might work out alright. For instance...there is a Hunts Coupon for $0.40 off 1 hunts can of tomato sauce or diced tomatoes. The deal at Albertson's is buy 20 cans for $20.00 and get $5.00 back. So, use ten 40 cent coupons with 3 doublers at Albertson's and you'll pay $12.00 ($11.00 if they double at 50 cents per coupon) and you'll get $5.00 back, thus paying $7.00 for 20 cans. Not a bad deal, especially good for food storage.

So, as I go through the ads I'll start posting. Hopefully this will prove to be helpful.

It's the first of the week and I'm already behind and ahead!

So, usually on Tuesdays I am scrambling all day to get my coupons cut and organized so I can go through them and finish this weeks deals and also be going through the new food day to get the next weeks deals lined up. I'm not kidding, I start this on Monday and usually finish around Wednesday. Then, I scramble to get all my dictation done on Monday and Tuesday as well from the previous Thursday and Friday.

This week, however, I was playing catch up because Dr. Milne decided to send me his dictations last week late, which made the current week dictations run a little behind too. Not to mention that last week was my turn to teach preschool. It's not a big deal otherwise. So, this morning before noon I completed all of my dictations, even the stuff they sent me yesterday...so I'm ahead of the game.

Now all I have to do is cut last week's coupons and file them, then head to the store to get more papers to sort those ones and then go shopping for several hours tonight at both Albertson's and Safeway to get my deals. Did you know that the cost of the Sunday paper went up 50 cents? Completely bogus...irritates me. Oh well, I still save so much more that I won't really notice it, but annoying nonetheless.

I'll be back later to post more about the dishwasher, right now Sam is really tired and needs me to hold her. I love that.

Just ran across this quote and I thought I'd share it.

"When I cannot feel the faith of assurance, I live by the fact of God's faithfulness." - Matthew Henry

I've no idea who Matthew Henry is, but I really liked this.

Help

Calling for help/advice with Alex. I have no clue here how to correct this. Alex is my middle child, maybe that is why we're having such difficulty with him. He is very angry all the time. I can only attribute it to anger because of how he acts. He tightens his fists and contorts his face and jaw and often screams so loudly along with it. He throws objects, kicks the walls, hurts his sibblings. I just don't know what to do here. I know part of it is me in that when he responds in that way I'm not always quick to be calm or patient, especially when someone gets hurt. I've tried time outs, the corner, spankings, nothing seems to work with him. I've tried calmly discussing with him how his actions make others feel, how they make me feel, and it doesn't seem to phase him. I've even fibbed to him before when he said, "I hate you", by telling him that when he says that he wants me to die and bleed and hurt and never wants to see me again. I know that's harsh, but I was thinking at the time that if he realized that by saying that the consequences were horrible he wouldn't say it anymore. It worked for awhile actually, but now that doesn't even work.

I spend extra time with him one on one because I feel that he needs the special attention so he doesn't act out. I'm wondering if he acts that way so I will give him the extra attention, and I certainly don't want him to think this extra attention is because of his behavior (which most of the time it is).

I've talked to the doctor about this and she seems to think that it is a phase, but in my opinion it is unacceptable. I cannot handle this behavior any longer. It's really wearing on me and bringing me down.

So help! I would appreciate any advise on how to handle this, and I don't even know if any of you can even offer any advise because I'm hoping you've never had this happen before, but if you can please offer it.

I loved and enjoyed conference so much. I really appreciated President Monson's talk about enjoying things now and being thankful for now because at some point in the future we'll crave the things we have now....although I'm not entirely sure I agree with the laundry part...I don't think I'll ever want that back when I don't have it....just the little bodies that occupied the clothes.

I'm certainly grateful for my family. I love my children so very much. I tell them everyday, more than they like to hear sometimes, that I do love them. They are so special and I've said it a thousand times before, but they are what makes me special.

My husband, the hard worker and forever student, is so wonderful. He is so patient with me most days....and most days I need that. It seems like I'm quick to loose it a lot these days...my voice is raised and I've just had enough, but I know he still loves me despite of it all. The other evening while eating dinner he reached over and rubbed my shoulders. I felt like crying. Not because there was anything particularly worth crying over, but because he could tell I needed special attention. I so appreciate that about him. He's really a great man, the best man I've ever met in fact.

I am grateful I have the opportunity to watch my children grow up, while still having a little ground in earning money for the family. Being able to work on Friday's has been a blessing in many ways and I cannot count them all. Besides the fact that I do get to be a stay-at-home mom, I get to work and feel needed in a different way and that makes me feel important.

I have to admit I missed the second Saturday session so I'll watch it this week. Please ask me if I've done it yet when you see me, knowing you will will give me the motivation I need to do it and do it quickly. Thanks in advance for that. :)

Getting fancier, maybe

I am attempting to change things up a bit...we'll have to see if I can figure things out further over the next week. I'm going to try to do better. Work was long today, which is fine because it always is long for me. Of course I had some weird things to work through, which is par for the course....I just wish I had more time to get things done that I really want to get done...don't we all.

Austin is shaping up to be a really great reader. I was a little worried about him for awhile and I have people tell me all the time that you have a child that is really great at math or reading....and Austin is really good with numbers. I just assumed he would always struggle with reading, but for the last week or so he has really shown a lot of improvement and has been even reading his own homework assignments! I'm very pleased with him.

I think it is pretty much official people...the grapes on one of my vineyards is nearly completely dried up. Judy came over and picked the last of them on that vine. I'll have to head out tomorrow and pick the concords. I have no idea what I'm going to do with them yet, we might just freeze and eat them. I was going to make raisins, but I can buy them for so much less, especially with the cost of electricity these days.

I'll have to post some pictures soon. Everyone will have to see what Sam's new short hair-do looks like. I'm finally over the initial shock of it all and I think pictures will be in order.

Oh, and hey, I made $40.00 today by selling some of my excess food storage! :) My work asked me to bring in some food for them because they can get it from me cheaper than they can from the store, so they were very excited. I have another order for next week which is going to be well over $60.00. Not too bad considering I only spend about $145.00/month on groceries for myself! Which reminds me that I need to do some deals tomorrow and Monday night and Tuesday night. It's hard to remember at this point because I really do have nearly everything I need. One thing I do want to start doing again is making my own bread. I haven't made a home made loaf in a couple of years....I should buy some yeast in fact. I'll let you know how that turns out...hopefully my bread maker still works. :)

Jon made dinner tonight and everyone ate it, except for Sam. She is getting increasingly picky lately...but I was just happy I didn't have to make it. What a good husband he is, I sure appreciate and love him.

I'm going to go to bed early...I'm just so tired lately. I think that's my body's cue for GET SOME MORE REST!

Today was a long day. Our power went out this morning. This is the first time that has happened since we have moved in the new house. Jon, fortunately, had woken up about 15 min earlier than normal and was in the shower already. I woke up instantly because our sleep number bed beeped, which is what it does when it is unpluged. It was only off for about 30 seconds. I reset the alarm to go off in an hour and a half from the 12:00am point, and went to bed. I woke up because Jon thought he would be a dear and change the time to the actual time. Well that broke the camel's back apparently and the alarm can't read the time right and started going off every 10 minutes instead. I tried to reset it after the second time, but was unsuccessful so I just got up....even though every fiber of my being was begging me not to. I had to get some dictation done yet and get my preschool things organized for class.

Preschool went well today, I felt like we accomplished a lot in a relatively short period of time, but the kids were more rowdy today than they were on Tuesday...not to mention that Samantha kept whinning about anything and everything, which was at times very distracting. Overall I think it went well and they learned something new...I know I did (I should have gone back to bed).

The rest of the day was busy. I can't tell you exactly what I did that was "busy" persay, but it was just busy. I cleaned up a lot of messes. Right as the last child left my house Samantha had her first accident in a long time...I think she thought she just had a little gas, but it was "lumpy gas" which she then had to stick her finger in and say, "Eww mom, poop". I said ok, don't touch anything and was rather loud at telling her because just as I said it she wiped her nose. So, she had a poopy bright green finger and nose. I was gagging and telling her to not touch anything else at the same time and so I'm sure the ladies from the preschool group thought it was a really rough day because now I was yelling at my kids! kinda funny now that I think about it. Anyway, so she got a bath.

Then later in the day she came downstairs asking me to help her wash her hands. I looked at her hands and as far as I could tell she just had water on them, it wasn't really sticky and didn't smell, but I took her word for it and washed her hands (can't be too careful around her). Only later did I realize what had happened. She went upstairs, opened the fridge and got out an egg. She cracked the egg, made an attempt to clean it up and pushed the yoke part under the fridge...it wasn't completely hardened yet, so I lucked out.

Then Judy Mecham came over to the house to pick some more grapes (she's been the only member of the ward to do so) and we were chatting in the backyard when I thought I'd better check on the kids. I got as far as the garage when I noticed my neighbor, Peggy, walking over to our house with Samantha. She ecaped through the front door and went 4 houses up the street to a different neighbor's house when Peggy saw her. So I thanked her after my near heart attack and kept Sam in the backyard with me. (As soon as Jon got home we went out to get a chain for the front door.)

I am being lazy tonight and am not even going to attempt to use my $10.00 off $50.00 coupons. I'll probably go tomorrow night if I can get it together, but we'll have to see. I'll probably just be out until close on Monday and Tuesday night so I can use the coupon as a roll over on the next week's deals.

Anyway, enough of my ramblings. I've got to get some more dictation done and then I'm going to go to bed early. I just can't stay awake tonight.

So, I just barely got home from shopping....and the funny thing is that I really didn't even shop that much. I did get a lot for my money, but it was the unexpected that has really taken me back. I'm so thankful to my Father in Heaven who has given me the opportunity to experience what I have tonight/early this morning. I was getting ready to do some rounds at Safeway with the new $10.00 off $50.00 coupon when I noticed this lady fumbling through her coupons and groceries, trying to get what she needed but not more than that. I think I've seen her in the store a few times, always late at night, and my friend Theresa has helped her with coupons before in the store. I smiled at her and went to get my cart. Right after that it was like a light went off and she recognized me. She asked me for help trying to find some of the $10.00 off $50.00 coupons. We looked through the store and couldn't find any food days. I gave her one of mine and that made her really happy. Anyway, we continued talking and I learned so much from her.

She was born and grew up in Germany, she married the first man who asked her to marry him and she never did love him. She had two children with him before divorsing him 17 years later...but during that time had to endure beatings and very hurtful things. As a child she grew up being bombed from home to home 3 times! She had only a potato and water to eat every day for many years. She worked in a factory that made hand made mink coats and she was very good at her job at the age of 14.

She learned several languages, English being one of them and when she finally moved to the US she had mastered English. She raised her boys on her own and they are very wonderful men now. She went back to school when she was in her 50's to get a degree so that she could teach Russian and Italian. She never finished school because she became very ill with cancer.

Anyway, there are so many more things I learned about her. What impressed me the most was, after I offered to give her a ride home (she had a pull cart to help her carry her groceries home with...and it just so happens that when we got outside to unload her groceries into my car the wheel broke off) we sat for about 3 hours and talked and she kept saying that she felt like she was a failure in God's eyes and that she was surprised she was still around because she had so many thoughts of suicide. It really upset her that she nearly completed her schooling to become a teacher but had to stop because of how ill she became. I quitely listened casually wiping tears from my eyes so she wouldn't notice. I told her that I've had my share of difficulties, as we all do, and that I know that there are times when we can feel extremely discouraged. I told her that I knew that Heavenly Father loved her and has her best interests at heart. I told her that maybe she didn't have the opportunity to finish her schooling now, but it was enough. She then said that at 70 how is she going to ever use it and I shared with her that I knew that whatever knowledge she acquired in this life would follow her into the next and that perhaps in the next life she would have the opportunity to cultivate it and teach others. I think that this gave her hope, only on account that she said that it did and asked me to repeat it several times. We talked a long time about many other things and I'm certain I'll always remember this.

However, I'm entirely too tired at past 2am to write anymore...I didn't even unpack all of the groceries. I'll try to write more tomorrow, but I just had to write at least part of this down because I feel so very blessed.

Dishwasher

Our dishwasher has been on the fritz for some time now. I can get it to work properly (reasonably) only every 7th time I use it or so. I keep putting it off because the expense of a dishwasher is not something I wanted right now...is it ever really? Anyway, last night I remembered I forgot to get the mail and went to get it. I found a home warranty renewal in it. The light went on. I had completely forgotten that we had a home warranty that covered the dishwasher! So, I put in a claim and it will cost me $55.00. Nice! I may not get a stainless steel one like I was planning, but a new dishwasher for $55.00 isn't too bad. What a blessing.

turn about is fair play

So since I tagged Jen she decided to get me with a new "tag"...here goes.

What are the last three things you purchased?
1. Groceries (that's a given)
2. drum pads for Rock Band
3. Book

What are the last three songs downloaded?

Jon really is the one who does this sort of thing and I advise sometimes.

What are your three favorite movies?

1. Charly
2. The Notebook
3. Made of Honor

What are three things that you have not done yet?

1. personal scripture study (family scripture study is done though and FHE!)
2. Sorted my ready to expire coupons
3. cleaned my bathroom

What are three things you cannot live without?(excluding people)

1. Couponing
2. my fitness equipment
3. food

What are your three favorite dishes?

1. Chicken Bog
2. Chicken and Wild Rice Chowder
3. Home made pork enchilladas

What are your three favorite TV shows?

1. Chuck
2. Heroes
3. Grey's Anatomy (I know I'm terrible for that one!)

What are the last three places you visited that were more than 100 miles away?

1. Mt. Hood (maybe not more than 100miles)
2. North Bend
3. Idaho

What are your three favorite desserts?

1. Oatmeal fudge bars
2. Oatmeal chocolate chip cookies
3. Brownies and Ice cream

What three things would I buy if money were not an issue?

1. A new vehicle
2. Have someone do the renovations on my home so we don't have to!
3. A vacation

So this evening I got some deals. I got:

5 gallons 2% milk
17 bottles of Ken's Salad spritzer
8 bottles Vitamin Water
4 bottles Powerade

I know it's not a whole lot, but I only paid $2.53. Not too bad...less than 1 gallon of milk.

I just used my overages from the Ken's Dressing coupon to eat into the Vitamin Water and milk. :)

Another haircut for Sam

So, today Sam got a hold of the scissors and cut her own hair this time. No accomplices. This was very unfortunate indeed because there was no clip that was going to do the trick this time. So, I took her in to get her hair fixed. Man is it ever short. I told the hair dresser that I had little expectations because I know she had little options. I just had one request and that was that I didn't want her to have a mullet...which is what I was certain she was going to have to have. Instead the gal cut Sam's hair so short that when Jon saw her he said, "I have three little boys now!"...bad bad bad.

Rest assured, she's still quite cute and lovely. It will grow back...someday.

I've been tagged!

So, Julie, the sweet dear, tagged me. What this means is that I'm supposed to write 7 interesting/weird facts about myself. While I would love to be able to add all the fancy smancy things that she and others do to their blogs, I've not figured out how to do all of that yet...I can figure out how to get my groceries for free, but not how to fancy blog. Go figure.

So, here goes:

1. I like to work out. I love the sense of accomplishment I get from a good burn and while I don't always see the results I want (have to figure out how to curb the eating part) I don't give up....and I like that about myself.

2. I was eating in the cafe at Fred Meyers when I was about 10 years old (my mother got my friend and I soft drinks, but we brought our own PB&J), when an armed robber entered the store and started shooting! A man ran past us with several bullet wounds and eventually died. The suspect was apprehended and I believe is still in jail to this day. We were obviously spared.

3. (already I'm realizing I'm not very interesting or weird for that matter) I am great at getting insurance companies to over-turn denials.

4. I really enjoy playing drums on Rock Band PS3.

5. I promised my sister that I would wait until I graduated high school before I got married. At the time I thought it a ridculous request since I didn't plan on marriage until after I went to college and became an orthodontist. When I became engaged at 16 I realized it was going to be harder than I thought. Fortunately, Jon and I worked together and we were married in the Portland Temple 1 month after graduation. I kept my promise.

6. My two favorite Prophets have been Ezra Taft Benson and Gordon B. Hinkley.

7. I used to be able to, but now cannot for obvious reasons, put both of my feet behind my head and then walk around on my bum. I wouldn't recommend it for anyone over 18, it's just not right.


So there you have it. Now I tag, Vickie, Teri, Tonya, Jenny Allen, Danica, Heather, and Tami.

Someday I'll figure out how to work this so it's easier for all of you. :)

So, today I was looking at Sam and she didn't look quite right to me. I wasn't sure what the deal was, but I took a long hard look to get to the bottom of it. It only took a few minutes when I noticed that some of her hair was missing. By golly...her hair had been cut! The culprit, not Sam herself, but Alex! That little stinker cut Samantha's hair. So I called my Theresa to tell her how upset I was about what I just discovered and you know what she said/did? She laughed, so hard no doubt she had tears coming down her cheeks. I kept telling her that this wasn't funny by any means, and you know what she did? She laughed HARDER! So, now I'm laughing at this point and realize that it's only hair. YES, I'm a little miffed that her sweet little bob now looks like a mushroom cut on one side of her head, but with a little crafty clippiness, I can pull it back and it looks reasonably normal. Hopefully it grows out enough for family pictures in December. I can be thankful he didn't take her finger off or part of her ear I guess.