Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Blah!

I'm completely nervous and anxious, I can't even say. I found a lump in my breast a couple of months ago and immediately made an appointment to see my doctor...they couldn't get me in to see them until this last Monday. So, I thought, I won't worry because there's no point in doing so until I know what to be worried about. A month after that I found another lump, in my other breast. Still, I remained calm and placed my fears on the Lord. How incrediblely peaceful I was about this. I hardly gave it any more thought actually.

Then I saw the doctor on Monday and was relieved because then I would know what was going on. But then, when the doctor told me that he wasn't sure what to make of one of the lumps, I felt sick. Why was I panicking now? I have had months to think about this, why am I so nervous now...it's driving me crazy. He told me that he wanted me to wait another 3-4 weeks, 4 weeks max, and then if it was still there then I needed to call and they would get me in for imaging immediately. One thing he kept saying was that I was so young...and so that was good. But hey, let's face it...I'm going to be 30 in about a month...which is still young, but older.

So, after hearing that I started thinking that maybe I should just get the imaging done now. I met my deductible when I was hospitalized in June for ectopic pregnancy....why wait? I called the doctor and he agrees now is a good time as any to start that process and I'm going in to start the process in a couple of hours. I don't even need to wait long....but it's long enough.

Maybe that's why I've thought so much about all sorts of weird things in the last few days...Blah...I have to get ready to go.

1 comment:

vaxhacker said...

The one thing that may have saved my mom's life a couple of years ago when she found a lump was how fast she got the diagnostics done, and (since it was positive in her case) got it taken care of immediately. I can't think of any reason not to run as fast as possible to get the answers you need and act on them. If it's negative or something benign, you can rest easier that much faster. If not, what the road ahead looks like is so much easier and better the sooner you take action.

In any case, our prayers go out to you.